


Snobby

by managerie



Series: Buffy The Vampire Slayer [2]
Category: Angel: the Series, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Coda, Ignores Comic Book Canon, M/M, Past Xander/Wesley, Post-Episode: s05e22 Not Fade Away, UST Xander/Giles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-11
Updated: 2015-08-11
Packaged: 2018-04-14 04:00:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4549578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/managerie/pseuds/managerie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Wesley wakes up in hospital to a familiar face</p>
            </blockquote>





	Snobby

~ * ~

Xander Harris sat in the uncomfortable plastic chair to the side of the generic hospital bed. The accommodations weren't what he was interested in anyway. It was the occupant of said bed that had his full attention. He placed his left hand on the right shoulder of one wounded Wesley Wyndam-Pryce and smiled."Hey Champ. How ya doin'?"

 

Wesley opened his eyes and smiled."Better than I imagined, thank you. How on earth did I get here? Where did you come from? I was told Rupert wasn't interested in helping. How did you arrive in time? I was certain I was dead..."

 

Laughing, Xander interrupted,"Whoa. You've been channeling your inner Willow there?"

 

Wesley relaxed and huffed a small laugh."Are my red roots showing? No, just... I was so sure I was dead you see. " Wesley's smile faded remembering his battle with Vail. He recalled looking into Fred's face and knowing he was dying. No hope. No chance to fix whatever had gone wrong. No last minute save. Not this time. This time it was to the death. Everyone's death.

 

He looked at Xander somberly, "To be here and alive is a shock. What happened?"

 

Xander took a deep breath. He didn't like that expression that had crossed over Wesley's face. He looked like Xander had felt the night before the final battle with The First. That absolute certainty that he and everyone he loved would die. That even then, it might not be enough to save humanity. That look and the feelings accompanying it sucked: hard. "Giles wasn't interested in helping Angel, no. But,well."

 

Xander moved his hand down to grab Wesley's and squeezed,"Once a Scooby always a Scooby. Right? We were monitoring things. We got Cordy back by the way. And we rushed you to the hospital as soon as that blue chick left. She's the one who took over Fred right?"

 

Wesley's face, having gone all gooey and sappy at the mention of his continuing status as a Scooby stilled and turned inward,"Yes... I. She was a sweet, young lady. With a great will to survive."

 

Xander swallowed hard and whispered softly, "I'm sorry Wes. We couldn't get her back. We tried I swear!"

 

Wes realized that Xander would feel responsible; for everything. Gently he squeezed Xander's hand,"Alexander...it's alright. I know you tried."

 

Closing his eye so he wouldn't have to see Wes' expression, Xander continued,"Wesley, I talked to Cordy. Fred was, you loved her and..."

 

A firm squeeze from Wes that didn't let up till Xander opened his eye and looked into Wesley's,"Stop. Yes. I, I thought I loved her. It... I am a great fool."

 

Xander earnestly assured the man,"No. You loved her. Just because she was interested in someone else at first doesn't make your feelings any less.... valid. I guess is the word?"

 

Xander looked to Wes to confirm he got the right word. At Wesley's nod he continued."I mean, look at me a Buffy? Maybe she couldn't return my romantic love but she's given me more than I could ever have hoped for in the friend love department." Placing his free hand on Wesley's stomach Xander continued,"Fred was a lucky girl to have two great guys love her."

 

The injured man placed his left hand over Xander's,"She reminded me so very much of you."

 

Surprised and delighted, Xander smiled, "Really?"

 

Nodding, Wesley continued,"Yes. She was brilliant in her own quirky way. Her babble could rival even yours when the subject excited her. She saw the world differently than most. She was a survivor. And no matter what horrors this world continued to throw at her she was always cheerful and" Wesley paused. He blinked a few times then sighed,"I just missed you so bloody much. It was unfair and dreadfully unkind of me to transfer my longing for you to her."

 

Puzzled, Xander asked,"Wesley? I thought... You said."

 

Wesley interrupted, "I know what I said. I was wrong and foolhardy and an idiot. The happiest time of my entire wretched life was spent in that cesspool of Oxnard, California with you. I should never have let you leave. I should have clutched at any happiness this world bestowed upon me with a desperate grip and never let go. I haven't forgotten a single moment. I cherished everyday. Just sitting at home watching television with your warmth along my side was a far greater joy than any I have experienced before or since. I am so sorry Alexander. Can you ever forgive me?"

 

Xander slowly shook his head,"Wes. You were right. I made you feel that I was using you as a substitute. Like you said, transferring."

 

Wesley stared at Xander "I can live with that. Should have lived with it. You did love me?" He waited for his answer.

 

Xander gasped, shocked, "Of course. I would never use anyone like that."

 

Wesley started to get upset. "It shouldn't have mattered that you cared for another. You chose me. I should have accepted that." Wesley tried to sit up. He looked frustrated and angry "Instead I ruined the whole bloody thing."

 

Worried about Wesley's stitches, Xander tried to calm the man,"Careful, Wes. Careful. You're still recovering. We'll talk again. Soon. Just rest."

 

Wesley clutched Xander's hands tightly. Looking straight into Xander's eye, Wesley confessed, "I love you, Alexander."

 

Xander extracted his hands and pushed the hair off Wesley's brow,"Love you too 'W'. Now get some sleep. I'll be by tomorrow."

 

Xander rose and kissed Wesley's forehead. He gently tucked the ailing man in and walked out of the curtained off area. Xander nearly ran right into a shocked Rupert Giles.

 

"Giles!" Xander yelped and stepped back.

 

Gasping a little, Giles stammered,"Xander, I... well.. I'm sorry I was eavesdropping. I came to check on Wesley. I didn't mean to overhear."

 

Xander narrowed his eyes, "What did you hear?"

 

Giles removed his glasses and started polishing them with a vengeance, "I am sorry. I... no." He stopped, placed the glasses back on and squared his shoulders. Giles looked directly into Xander's face, "I'm not sorry. I heard you and made a conscious decision to stay and listen. I ask forgiveness for intruding. I honestly couldn't fathom what you would have to say to Wesley Wyndam-Pryce of all people." Giles swallowed, then went on in a much gentler tone."I heard about Oxnard. I heard it all Xander. Why? Why didn't you tell us? I would have let you go to him. Monitoring from a far was a precaution because of Angel. I would never have purposely kept you from your lover."

 

Xander lowered his head to hide the blush,"It wasn't like that. Alright yeah we-we were lovers but he sent me back to Sunnydale. He didn't think he was who I wanted. I guess I was too honest with him about why I found him attractive. It got too much and he couldn't take being, in his mind at least,second place. I understood that even then."

 

Giles waited until Xander raised his head,"You just said you love him."

 

Eye wide, Xander stammered, "Oh, I do. Like I love Cordy or Buffy...even Willow when you take in the whole fluke thing. But,I'm not in love with him anymore. No more than I am in love with Cordy. We tried. We failed. But we still care you know?"

 

Looking towards the curtains that contained the healing Watcher, Giles declared,"I dare say Wesley still cares a great deal."

 

Xander waved his arms around, "He's hopped up on meds and he-he lost Fred. Maybe he was attracted to her because she reminded him of me. But, Fred was her own person. That person was who Wesley fell in love with. That's something Wes couldn't see in Oxnard and I guess can't see now. People have a type that they are instantly attracted to. It might have been a particular person that started the ...um.. Kink? No."

 

Amused, Giles offered,"Preference?"

 

Smiling, Xander continued, "Yeah. I mean, look at Anya? She was just another version of Cordy, right? Honest to the point of blunt. Money crazy. Opinionated and self involved. Come to think of it, Buffy was like a Slayer version of Cordy when she arrived in Sunny D. So, I guess my type with girls is _Bossy_. My type with men seems to be, _Snobby, British Researcher_."

 

Giles arched a brow at this description. Xander flushed then hastily continued,"His problem was he couldn't see that just because I had a preference, didn't mean I wasn't in love with Wesley. My love for Anya wasn't less because of her similarities to Cordy, anymore than Willow's love for Tara was lessened by her history with Oz. Willow is attracted to quiet, contemplative people. Probably because she always talks way before her brain's had a chance to work out the train of thoughts."

 

Giles chuckled, "Probably."

 

Smirking, Xander finished,"Anyway. He's just lost his world. So, yeah when you're falling you try to grab a hold of any kind of life line. Right now, I'm his rope. He'll realize soon that what we had, though great, is gone." Xander looked around and sighed," I'll go. You stay with him. I'll see him tomorrow."

 

Xander started to walk away. Rupert turned and called out,"Xander?"

 

Xander stopped but did not turn around.Head bowed, the young man asked,"Yeah?"

 

Rupert cleared his throat, then charged ahead,"Who was it that started your particular preference for 'Snobby, British Researcher' types?"

  
After a few heartbeats, Giles was certain Xander wouldn't answer. 

When Xander started walking again his only response was a quiet, "Good night, Giles."

 

~ * ~ 

**Author's Note:**

> No Beta Reader. Originally posted on LiveJournal 11th-Mar-2010


End file.
